Hello Beautiful Soul,
Thank you for poping in again ,
The pain was not your fault .
There was a time in my life when I would look in the mirror and feel nothing for the person that was looking back at me .
The things that I allowed my self to believe ,words that came from someone else’s mouth , trying to break my soul .Sadly they were working more than I released . Maybe he was clever or maybe I was too young to know any different. You never notice when it is happening ,if anything ,it is the shocking actions that occur that your brain can not comprehend and the impact of the words that are been spoken ,attack your whole being.
The attacks start small, but big enough for you to start to believe them .Little by little your confidence starts to shrink .The happy ,smiling girl that once looked back at you in the mirror ,smiles less each day .She is gone somewhere and he thrives on her absence .The power is growing ,the control takes hold and you forget what life was like before you let him in .
The pain was not your fault but you coming back and healing is all about you .
Your self worth has been battered and your self esteem floored and he got high on the whole process .No wonder you feel pain and no wonder you question yourself and love and what the hell is it all about .It is not normal to feel pain by the hands of the one who says they love you .It is not normal to mature and feel weaker .It is not normal to loose yourself for someone else’s demands .
You feel the pain deeper because empathy is your trait .You allowed the suffering to go on longer than most would . The problem with empathy is ,while it is a gift ,it also has to be taken care of. There was nothing ever wrong with you .You could see his pain but what you did not get ,is that it was not created by you and therefore it was not your responsibility to fix .You did not know that at the time but as your pain grew and he got of on it ,you started to wake up .
The pain I felt became very obvious to me as my eyes opened ,I could now see where it was coming from .He could do what ever he wanted and I would always be to blame .His temper and anger always directed at me ,he never and never would take responsibility for anything he put me through . The pain was not my fault but my healing was .
If you are here wondering about the pain ,KNOW IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT .
You may feel empty now but trust me you can fill your self back up .
You may feel shameful but trust me you have nothing to be a shamed about so let it go .
You may feel weak but your are so not weak ,not at all .Just take a minute to look at what you put up with it and how you survived .You don’t walk out of a burning house if you are weak ,you walk because you are strong .Yes you may have pain ,cuts and bruises and burns to heal and you will because you deserve so much more .
You may think you are powerless but you are not .You have the power to create anything you want and be who ever you want to be .Inside you there is power beyond what you believe .
If I can do it ,so can you .
Make your healing bigger than the pain and watch it all slip away .
#inspiringthepowerofyou #paidlink #goodreadsforyou
